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Poop burgers?

posted Sunday, 16 September 2007
Having attended many a banquet with foreign friends and guests, ACB is well aware of the trepidation with which many Westerners approach traditional Chinese food.

Some gag when they are told what exactly it is that they are eating. Other's secretly suspect that they are being fed dog or cat, while many more simply aren't used to the idea that many ingredient of Chinese dishes are considered to be food (frogs and turtles, for example. Entrails and fat, for another).

However, while poking fun at Chinese food (and occasionally a pair of figures down the back of the throat, too) has long been a source of humor amongst foreigner, ACB feels that it is now time to turn the tables. In this light included below, for your viewing pleasure, is a photograph of a foodstuff that was served up to some colleagues of mine by Western caterers during a lunchtime banquet not so long ago.

Apparently, it's a real dish, though ACB isn't exactly sure whether it was cooked, or simply found behind a rather large dog.



During ACB's time in the West, ACB heard, on occasion, a foreigner declare "SH*T on a Stick". For all these Years, ACB had thought that they were cursing, now it appears that they were simply ordering takeout.

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1. Mike Squires left...
Wednesday, 26 September 2007 3:07 pm

I want the world to wake up before we have to eat dog poo. I wrote a book titled Dragons in the Surf, where China and Iran for an unwholly alliance to dominate the world. You can find it at Amazon and other online book stores. This work of fiction reads like your everyday newspaper. See the future unfold before your eyes, and be afraid, very afraid as you watch you jobs and industries fall under China’s control before the missiles start coming at you……believe it. The next World War has already started and most of you haven’t even noticed.


2. ACB left...
Saturday, 29 September 2007 3:53 am

China secular Westward looking nation, Iran is an conservative Muslim nation that is most definitely not Westward looking. The only thing that they have in common is their dislike of other nations interfering in their business, and a few shared economic interests. China is as likely to form a tag team with China as North Korea is with Monaco. The premise of you book is laughable.

Why not just write about Treble K members forming an alliance with a San Fransisco GLB chorus groups? It's about as believable.


3. Mike left...
Saturday, 29 September 2007 9:49 am

Nice try, but remember, " the eneny of my enemy is my friend". Buy the book and see for yourself. Read the newspapers and find out about why Chineese missiles are being used by Iran or why China is buying Aircraft Carrier busting missiles off Russia. I could go on, but do you think these two nations could co-exist? About as plausable as your Monaco comment. I like your toy on combating spam. Care to share the reasoning with us?


4. ACB left...
Saturday, 29 September 2007 4:58 pm

"the eneny of my enemy is my friend"

Ah, but this is where you went wrong. For China, America isn't an enemy, it's an opportunity. China is getting rich off of the spending power of American consumers. To use a western analogy "Why would China kill the goose that lays the golden eggs?".

"why Chineese missiles are being used by Iran"

Er, because China will sell them to it. China sees a market and Iran sees a supplier, it's basic globalized capitalism, there aren't all that many ideological similarities there's just economic interests. Iran would buy Israeli missile if Israel ever were dumb enough to sell them.

China is a secular nation, it would aggressively stamp out even the idea of an Iranian Islamic influence in China. When I say aggressive, I mean jail and torture aggressive.

"why China is buying Aircraft Carrier busting missiles off Russia"

For the same reason that America is investing in missile defense.

"do you think these two nations could co-exist"

Which two nations, China and Iran or China and America?

China is existing with America fine right now. You only need to look at the shelves in Wal-Mart to see that.

"Care to share the reasoning with us?"

Reasoning on what?


5. Mike Squires left...
Sunday, 30 September 2007 2:54 pm

I agree with you ABC, even though we are talking about a work of fiction. The two nations I refer to are China and Iran, and we both know the answer to that one. The feelings between Japan and China worry me more, but I always have more fun in China. Taking that satellite out with a rocket from an earth base was a cool trick, but as a friend of mine at NORAD said, "impressive, but thanks for all the extra junk I have to monitor". But she did mention that she swears she saw the two dog turds float by.


6. Mike Squires left...
Monday, 1 October 2007 2:01 pm

I agree. We both know who will come out on top between Iran and China. Iran is currently being run by fanatics, whereas China by calculating Communists. I surprized the Chinese Thought Police have not shut you down yet. I worry more about the animosity between China and Japan more than what is in my book of fiction. I'll bet that Japan has the capacity to produce and stage Nukes for action within 2 months if not sooner. What do you think. While we are at it have you read this site? http://www.irandefence.net/forumdisplay.php?f=11 I go to Japan and China quite a bit. Always more fun in China. Cheers. Mike


7. ACB left...
Wednesday, 3 October 2007 2:27 am

"I surprized the Chinese Thought Police have not shut you down yet"

They more or less did a couple of times.

As for the rest. your gues isn't too far off. The "official" estimate is that it would take Japan 3 months to convert its civilian nuclear power program and its space program into a fully fledged nuclear armed ICBM program capable of Nagasaki/Hiroshima+ scale detestation across China.

However, even a cursory knowledge of modern day Japan would tell you that something pretty seismic would have to happen in order for Japan to even begin such a program let alone for any Japanese government to launch an actual nuclear missile.

As the world's only victim of a nuclear attack, Japan is socially the most anti-nuclear nation in the free world. Japan sat next to China, Russia and North Korea for the entirety of the cold war and it didn't go nuclear, so it's certainly not going to do it in peacetime without something dreadful happening first.

I also sincerely believe that China and Japan won't go to war.

First of all there are the practicalities. 1) Japan simply doesn't possess the ability to go to war overseas. Its constitution prohibits it from maintaining the hardware that it would need to launch a war of aggression, such as long range missiles and bombers and it doesn't possess the equipment needed for an invasion. Most of its capabilities are defensive. 2) China doesn't possess the ability to go to war with both Japan and Taiwan. A war with Japan would divert sufficient resources that China wouldn't be able to stop Taiwan from declaring independence (remember, China has no aircraft carriers, and only limited long range capabilities. 3) Japan is too valuable an outpost for America to risk loosing it to China. America would deploy everything it had in Japan's defense and when you combine Japan's defense capabilities with America's attack capabilities you have a force that China couldn't beat.

Secondly, China and Japan are both significant trading partners. Their economies would suffer too much from a war for the respective country's vested interests (read: businessmen) to allow there to be a war. They would pressure the government before it got that far.