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The Rabbit Hole: 101 things not to say in China
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| As any veteran foreigner in China
knows, one of the latent talents possessed by many
Chinese people, is to ask irritating questions that every
previous Chinese person, that said foreigner has
encountered for the past 6 months, has already asked
before, however, it often takes a true veteran to answer
these questions correctly without A) Making yourself sound interested enough to get dragged into an endless conversation on how everything worthwhile in the world originated from China B) Offending 1.3 billion people who might decide to throw rocks at you. C) Getting yourself locked up by the PSB For your reading pleasure (and personal safety) here are a couple of common questions and a couple of the answers that you should try to avoid giving, along with a sample answer that will neither encourage the questioner to elaborate further, or to stone you to death in the belief that you are a Japanese tourist. Do you know what is happening in Beijing in 2008? • No, but I know what happened there in 1989 Correct answer: Yes, now about that ‘other’ fascinating thing you were going to tell me … Have you seen the Great Wall? • We have one too, but it’s bigger • Yes, I liked it so much that I hacked a chunk off to take home as a souvenir • No, does it have lasers on it? • Didn’t the Mongols build it to keep the Chinese in? • I saw the one in Berlin, did you build that one too? • Berlin used to have one just like it, but the Americans made them take it down • I saw some of it on a building site in Zhongwei • Didn’t Luke Skywalker blow it up in Episode IV? Correct Answer: Yes, it was big Have you tried Peiking Duck? (Inspired by Ian) • Peeking Duck, that’s animal porn, right? • I had a Peiking duck wrap in KFC once, does that count? • No, I don’t hold with eating filthy foreign food • No, my pet mallard would never forgive me for eating his relative • Mr. Quack-Quack says that I must hurt you now • Any answer involving the words 'food' and 'poisoning' Correct Answer: Yes, it was good, but not as good as your local food Can you use chopsticks? • I can use them to scratch my AR*E • I only ever eat in McDonalds and KFC • Civilized people use forks • Yes, can you use a knife and fork? (Inspired by SDAsian) • Yes, the hookers in Chinatown taught me when I was a kid Correct Answer: Yes, two elderly Buddhist nuns taught me to use them while I was helping Chinese migrant workers in foreign countries to return to the motherland Can you speak Chinese? • 我有普通话，可是我不要说。 • 你说什m… Oh B*GGER • Yes, they taught me in the spy school that I attended in Taiwan • All BBC/NHK/CNN China correspondents are taught top speak Chinese • Of course, Chinese is so simple only an idiot couldn’t speak it after a few weeks • なに？ Correct Answers: Yes, a little/说一点点No Do you know about Chinese history? • No, but it shouldn’t take me long to pick it up • No, but I would like you to tell me EVERYTHING. • No, can you summarize it for me? • No, but it doesn’t sound very important. • I know the bits that your government didn’t tell you • I know what happened in 1949 and 1989 • I know what Fusosha Publishing says happened, and that’s good enough for me • I saw Walt Disney’s Mulan, once, while drink • I saw that film at Cannes last year Correct Answer: Yes, now about that ‘other’ fascinating thing you were going to tell me … Have you been to (insert name of local tourist attraction)? • No, can you tell me about it? • Is it any different from the one that they have in (insert rival village name here)? • When you’ve seen one seen one 5000 year old Pagoda, you’ve seen em all. • We had one just like it in my country, but they knocked it down to build a Starbucks • We have one in my country, but it's better • I saw one like it in Fujian, but it didn’t have so many beggars outside • Does it have fairy lights wrapped around it? Correct Answer: I don’t remember. What is your telephone number? • ANY answer that involves the word ‘yes’ or your actual telephone number Correct Answer: any number belonging to anybody who can’t give the caller your real telephone number Do you like China? • Yes, but I preferred Taiwan • I like ‘Chinatown’ • Yes, but I preferred it when the Brits/Japanese/Nationalists were running the joint • Do you mean the ROC or the PRC? • No, the communists ruined it • No, it’s a poverty stricken totalitarian hole • I’d like it even more if it wasn’t occupying Tibet • I like the bits that aren’t aiming missiles at my sisters house in Taipei • You would have liked the answer better if you had asked me in February • ANY honest answer that starts with ‘No’ or include the words ‘but .... ' Correct Answer: Yes, it’s very big and has a wall/Yes, me very like like China. Feel free to send in any suggestions of your own. |
|
This is laugh out loud funny, ACB. I like the ones about the Great Wall,
and the Do you like China one expecially.
"Feel free to send in any suggestions of your own."
I live in Beijing and so get this one a lot...
Have you ever eaten Peking Duck?
* Everyday
for brekfast
* Yes, and the tianmianjiang (sauce) that comes with it
makes a decent facial moisturizer
* I have a pet mallard, you sick
bastard
* Yes, it's required to get your residence permit
Correct Answer: Oh, that's my favorite. Really.
Good post, nice blog ;)
HELLLLLLOOOOOOO
*£&$* OFF
*Hi! How are you! I've really been looking
for someone to talk to. I was wondering, if China really is the centre of
the universe and the Chinese are God's gift to mankind, why do you need so
much foreign investment from the States and Japan to
develop?
*すみません、えいごおはんえしません。
Correct Answer: Bitte, Sprechen Sie
Deutsch?
Do you know Da Shan 大山?
No. I've never heard of him.
Not sure, Which big mountain are you talking about?
Yes, I can't stand the little howdy doodie looking puppet.
Yes, he's the poster boy for the Chinese Communist Party isn't he?
Oh, you mean the Canadian guy who speaks pretty good Chinese and is currently involved in huge scandal?
Visit me @ http://thehorsesmouth.blog-city.com
I have a pet mallard you sick bastard?! Ha ha. Oh dear, I'm in tears.
Do you like China? Only the bits that aren't pointing missiles at my sisters house in Taipei? Fantastic stuff. I can just imagine their faces, they wouldn't have a CLUE what on earth was going on.
Can't think of others now, laughing too much.
I've sent links of this site to all my friends in china.
MaDing
Do you like Chinese food?
- Yeah, it's better than exlax.
Visit me @ http://thehorsesmouth.blog-city.com
Regarding chopsticks, here's one that my Australian roomate in Japan taught
me:
Japanese Q: Can you use chopsticks?
Australian A: Yes! Can
you use a knife and fork???
This one seems to really gets the goat of all north Asians in a big way....
SDAsian
I think that this was because they thought that it was a rude question rather than because they couldn't.
Many people in Japan are either very traditional not so being able to use a knife and fork either isn't a big thing because 'it's a funny foreign habbit', or they have been gratuitiously exposed to the huge US military presence in Japan and the foreign food that they bring with them, so they already know how.
Then again, if you ask a 'tendy youth' who is an Amerricanohpile (there are loads of Gajin lovers in Japan) and they can't it does tend to embarras them. It's like being an Anime fan but not being able to speak a word of Japanese going to a convention and being forced to admit that they have to wait for the dub.
(Upon finding that you've lived in Japan)
'What do you think of the Japanese?"
1. I like them, much more trustworthy and honest than the
Chinese
2. I like them, they're industrious, responsible, hardworking,
and know how to co-operate, unlike the Chinese
3. I like them, they are
polite and civilised, unlike the Chinese.
4. Japanese girls are better
in bed than Chinese girls.
5. Apart from a certain unfortunate period in
the 20th century, they are wonderful people.
6. What use does it make
what I think? All Chinese hate the Japanese and you obviously do
too.
What you should say: 'I like the Chinese much better. And Chinese food is just delicious. I really love Peking Duck!'
It's the one soul in 1.4 billion bodies thing. The father of All Splittist
Tendencies, The Dalai Lama, has it right when he says, "Where there's one
Chinese person, there'll shortly 40,000."
Q: Is he the guy with black
hair, about 5'8" with glasses that's a mouthbreather?
A: Yes!
William Meldrum [immota@mac.com]
William
That's either too deep for me to comprehend or the English is too tough for me to understtand.
My response is squarely
What?
ACB
Don't forget:
1) Are you married?
a) Yes, often.
b) No, that's why
I'm here. Are you offering?
c) Only for tax purposes.
d) I despise
families and children.
e) I can't get you a green card.
2) How much
money do you make?
a) More than your entire family (up to and including
second cousins) combined.
b) Nothing, I'm on a mission from God.
c)
They pay me in 饺子.
d) You mean when I do actually get paid?
e) Money
is the devil of the running dog bourgeoisie. Your country has lost its way
and must be purged.
3) Where are you from/Are you American?
a) Depends
whos askin'.
b) Somewhere in the vicinity of Betelgeuse.
c) No, I'm
from the splittist Republic of Texas.
d) It's called Jesusland
now.
e) I have dual citizenship in country X and country Y (Taiwanese
respond with sage understanding of your pragmatism; mainland Chinese heads
explode).
Here's another good one that always wokz for me:
Chinese person: "Oh! How strange! You are left-handed!"
sdasia: "Yes! And it is proven that left-handed people are both more intelligent and more creative. Interesting that all Chinese people are right-handed."
Dave: that dual passport one above is an awesome! Especially when you plop them both on the table...
Here's one that I get asked all the time:
Why did you marry a Chinese girl?
a) Marry? No, she's my little slave. That's what you all are to me.
b) Because she's RICH.
c) Because I want to join the CCP!
d) American girls, well...their asses just can't compare to Chinese girl's..if you know what I mean..
e) I want to learn Chinese.
f) I want to learn English.
g) I got tired of paying for Chinese prostitutes.
h) I got tired of paying for Chinese students.
i) Okay, you got me: I am planning to take other China. I figure marrying a Chinese girl is the best way to go.
j) She knew more about sex than I did.
k) I love her you *$#%$ idiot!
l) I want to immigrate to China.
Hank
Gordon, I like the Da Shan question, I was asked a lot.
My
question:
Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?
Why not?
Do you want
a *Chinese* boyfriend/girlfriend?
Why not?
Help me with answers! I never knew what to say, but it seemed like they weren't so much interested in my love life as they were hoping that I found Chinese people attractive...
Huan
"Money is the devil of the running dog bourgeoisie. Your country has lost
its way and must be purged."
That's the funniest one yet! I love it. :-)
Filthy Stinking No.9 [g2jon@yahoo.com]
On the topic of why you married a Chinese girl.
A former flatmate who has married a Vietnamese-Chinese girl always responds with the answer "because I like small bums" ... and it instantly causes all further discussion on the topic to cease. Just about the perfect answer, in other words.
Filthy Stinking No.9 [g2jon@yahoo.com]
My standard answers:
Are you American?
->No, but I'll admit I'm way
overweight.
How much money do you make?
->I'm too embarassed to tell
you, sorry.
Your Chinese is very good.
->不是吧！中文太南学得多。我一点儿也不会说.
Can
you help me move to Europe?
->No, sorry.
Why aren't you
married?
->Ask all those girls who don't want me; I sure don't
know.
I'm sure I can find you a Chinese girlfriend. Shall I help
you?
->Don't bother, I'm too old for that.
Are you all alone in
China?
->It's absolutely impossible to be alone in China: there is
invariably a crowd.
Works fine for me.
Tuur
How much money do you make?
I often answer truthfully: "I can't tell you that! One person says I'm making too much, the next person tells me I'm making too little. Either way I feel bad!"
Q: Where are you from?
A: Poland.
their response, ???????????
They don't know a thing 'bout Poland and they shut up. I am really from the US but we all know what that leads to.
bert
me: so why is it call the national day??
chinese: 'cause it's the day
when chinese people finally got free.
me: ah! you mean when mao
died???
chinese: ......
(Real conversation with my teacher)
BLK [blk_79@hotmail.com]
What do think of the architecture in Shanghai?
a) aren't they all
designed by foreigners?
b) I like Beijing's better
c) you mean those
edifices developed by HongKong crooks, approved by corrupt city officials,
designed by inept Chinese design institutes, managed by sycophantic
arrogant lazy Shanghainese, built by exploited peasants, occupied by
boorish laowais with desperate Shanghainese girlfriends?
d) aren't they
all copied off magazines?
e) no, I like the women better
Correct answer: Yes, Shanghai is world class city, so modern and new, its the best city in the world in fact!
the crow
Do you like it here? (eg, the US)
a) I would like it better if the stinky
beggers around each and every corners in downtown San Francisco could
instead form a band or a circus.
b) No, since only 8% of people could
actually achieve its retirement goals, and 3% out of the 8% through
inheritance.
c) I would like it better if it is not the country with the
highest number of prisoners spending their lives in lockers.
d) I would
like it better if there are fewer high school students dealing drugs and
fucking around, hopefully not many teenage moms sitting in the
classroom.
e) I would like it better if not every pompous american or at
least redneck think the country is the best in the whole world like the
British used to claim their country as the "sun never goes down
empire".
................
Correct answere: oh yeah, it is the best democracy in the whole world.
joker
Joker
You do know that 'the sun never sets on the British Empire' actually meant that the empire was so big that it was always daylight somewhere in it, don't you? I might not be that up on European history, but I do known what that phrase means.
I sence bitterness in this one Obi-Wan
ACB
Here's one I get quite often in England
Q: Where are you from?
A: Hong
Kong
Q: Is that in Japan?
A:
1 - Yes it was actually the ancient
capital of Japan where they trained warriors in the samurai code
2 -
Well...Up to a point
3 - Your grasp of geography is indeed impressive.
Tell me, have you ever been outside Shropshire?
4 - No just because I am
waaaaaay richer than you it does not mean I am Japanese
5 - Do they
teach history at school these days?
6 - No I will not spare you any
change mate.
Correct answer:
- No, it's actually in China but
used to be a British Colony, and thank god for the British Empire because
if it weren't for their civilizing effects on us yellows we'd be as poor as
China!
HKie
HKie
Dude, now that one REALLY suprises me, I thought that all Brits knew about the Empire, after all, every five minutes there seems to be some former colony or other getting on at them about something that they did about 5000000000 years ago.
On the other hand, I've seen both history and geography texts used in British schools, they barely even learn domestic hisotry and geography let alone world history and geography, most Brits can't even name their last three kings or all of the counties of their country.
If you go to a school in Japan, a child who can't name the last 10 Emperors AND all of the prefectures, by the age of 10, is considered to be a foreigner.
Maybe your question should be "What do you know about the Opium Wars?" As long as you ask a Brit who hasn't been to China, I bet that almost every Brit that you meet won't have a CLUE what you're talking about. "Opium? War?, errr ... Columbia?
While Britain's history might be off, mine is pretty nifty, If it wasn't for the British Emprie, there wouldn't be a Hong Kong, and you would probably be a farmer in Canton, so play nice with the Brits, they saved your ancestors from the mainland.
ACB
Every person looks at the world through different lenses though the world
is the world. If you have a distorted picture in your mind, then you would
probably sort out that kind of lenses to look at everything.
Bitterness
or not, I don't believe that every single culture/civilization is more
superior than the other. Considering China, your favorite subject, It used
to lead the whole world for about 2000 years (people from many countries
used to live there peacefully) while today it is struggling in every
aspects to revive. I picked the UK only because it used to be a super power
having colonies everywhere in the world.(I do know what that phrase means,
dude) However look at where the UK is today. Same thing can happen to the
US if people are becoming too pompous/ignorant and rejecting everything
different. It is quite natural in human history for different nations to
lead at different time period. People do learn from different
nations/cultures. Unfortunately it is always easier for people to learn the
bad stuff first. (the first bunch of words people learn in a foreign
language normally include some curse words).
joker
I don't so much mind the questions themselves (practicin' the language,
dialects, and the thirty-five thousand different ways they seem to have to
ask the same question and all, plus brownie points for curiosity) but what
kills me is when they ask when the answer is staring them square in the
face.
halfway through dinner which I've eaten with chopsticks without
dropping anything :
"so can you use chopsticks?"
ten minutes into a
conversation, not monologue, mind you, conversation, with a random person
on the street :
"so can you speak chinese?"
vaguely related, for some reason everyone seems to think I'm russian. still haven't figured out why....
Visit me @ http://echoes.blog-city.com
"you would probably be a farmer in Canton, so play nice with the Brits,
they saved your ancestors from the mainland"
That is not funny, ACB. You
made sound it as Chinese are not capable of running their country.
But
the CCPs aren't the elite of Chinese people. Look at Taiwan, and all the
other wealthy Chinese
people overseas such as in southeast Asia and
US.
Another HKie
Another HKie
Errr, but without the Brit's there would be no modern Hong Kong. Hong Kong is only prosperous because the Brits opened it up as a trade hub. No Brits no trade hub.
Also, traditionally, most of Chinese dvelopment has been along the east coast and in the north, NOT in the south. Without Hong Kong, all of the southern development that grew up because of it wouldn't exist.
"Look at Taiwan, and all the other wealthy
Chinese
people overseas"
You forgot one, Hong Kong itself, Hong Kong was rulled by the Brits and paid for by trade, but it was run on the bolld sweat and toil of Chinese who escaped from the mainland.
joker
Europe didn't lead the world for about 2000 years, The British and Spanish Empires lasted only about 300 years each, the Roman Empire lasted longer but didn't reach far outside of north Africa, and for the for much of this time only a few countries in Europe actaully took part in this ruling.
ACB
OK people, lets keep this thread limited to comedy.
ACB
One of the most annoying things here is that Chinese believe that due to
the invention of a few key items: gunpowder, the compass etc, you know the
rest, then that somehow means their culture 'led the world' for 2,000
years. These discoveries hardly amount to a cultural empire. It's never led
anything.
In Jiangsu
OK here's another one.
Do you think my tits are small?
- No, but I wish
I'd noticed just how padded bra was.
- They're great. Stop putting that
weird cream on them all the time. It tastes bad.
- Westerners' tits are
too big. It's dangerous. A classmate was suffocated.
- Your nipples are
much bigger than any blonde woman's.
Correct answer: Yes, but so's my wang. So we're compatible in an Eastern way.
In Jiangsu
In Jiangsu
'Weird Cream', last time I looked China had a LOT of weird boob creams
You have:
Cream to make them firmer
Cream to make them
bigger (like 'those' kind of creams actually work)
Cream to make them
whiter
Maybe somebody should invent a 'cream to keep white guys away'.
"One of the most annoying things here is that Chinese believe that due to the invention of a few key items:"
China invented gunpowder, yet Japan had more rifles.
China invented the compase, but it orderer its fleet to return home and let the Europeans build the worlds greatest nautical empire that eventually reached Asia.
I'm noticing a theme here.
ACB
Hmm...there's been quite alot of banter here
ACB though it pains me to admit it, there is some merit to what you say, but the Chinese have been around for ages, and regardless of who invented what, whatever we did - it worked, it would be a pretty safe bet to say that a long time from now, when Egypt, Greece, Rome, France, Britain, and even the US Empires have come and gone, we'll probably be still around, still spitting in the streets and eating with chopsticks...our culture may not mean much to you, but its strength is in its longevity, the Chinese are nothing if not survivors.
But in regards to HK, Hong Kong prospered not only because it had a stable rule of law, (Courtesy of the British), but also because of the influx of capital and manufacturing know-how from the entrepreneurs who were fleeing from Shanghai and Canton. It is actually somewhat pointless to attribute HK's undeniable success solely to one particular factor or another. The British ruled India too, and things haven't worked out quite as well there (yet). The crucial point I believe is that the government (without any democracy whatsoever I might add) just sat back and said 'get on with it'. This is important because ironically this may be the tact with which the Chinese government (eventually) takes - so long as crappy foreign ideologies (cf. Karl & Frederich) don't get in the way. Which makes me think whether freedom and democracy are things which are forever intrinsically linked (As Georgie would have you believe - Patriot Act anyone?)
But that's enough politik, I could go on all day. And I have exams, which really should be taking a higher priority in my life right now.
Final note:
In a recent general knowledge survey of Britain's 16
year olds, approximately 70% of responders thought Churchill was the dog in
the TV advert for Churchill Car Insurance. (www.churchill.com)
I wish I was joking. Time to put them into re-education camps I feel.
HKie
In S. Korea ( I'm Australian)
Q: Are you an American?
A: No are you
Japanese?
Stops them in their tracks every time...
John Goddard
Q. where are you from ?
A. 1.not from this country
2. from a dark
warm and wet place... now that place is to small for me so i cannot go
back
deming
I'm in Shangdong now, but hey.
Just been asked where I was from when taking a picture of LeiFeng (commie soldier hardworking hero).
I said: Leifeng Country.
She walked away immediately.
I am British and it's too true that many kids these days are depressingly thick and uneducated about the place. The Churchill thing is grotesque and I wonder in what context the question was set. A figure of 40%, still appalling, would not have surprised me.
Things are polarizing in the UK - you have your middle classes and your scum class. It's getting worse. Maybe we too need a dictatorship to beat the same thing into our heads for the first 20 years of our life. Chinese culture is the best culture. China is the best. Chinese culture is the best culture. China is the best. Chinese culture is the best culture. China is the best. Chinese culture is the best culture. China is the best. Chinese culture is the best culture. China is the best. Chinese culture is the best culture. China is the best. Chinese culture is the best culture. China is the best. Chinese culture is the best culture. China is the best. Chinese culture is the best culture. China is the best..............................
In Jiangsu
HKie, like your post, especially the thoughts on HK and the line of whether
freedom and democracy is the same.
But I don't think that the passing of the glories and achievements of the countries you mention means that they have lost their inherent culture. All those places will still be around for a long time.
Brits still drink tea and beer, and nothing else, and that will never change. So your point about chopsticks and spitting and how Chinese culture survives is not really valid, I feel.(We also don't care about our families and it's always foggy in London - or so I'm told anyway).
More likely you were referring to the relative importance of countries and on that point China may too have its era, if they ever sort it out. Its population is its strength and weakness I think.
In Jiangsu
In Jiangsu
I couldn't agree more, Britain need a few years under an iron nationalist heal. The Brits need some national pride, and I don't mean gay pride style junk from Tony 'I will listen to any liberal garbage if it gets me a vote' Blair.
Britain needs to be kicked in the nuts and told that it ruled 1/4 of the F*UCKING WORLD, and that it brought stability and the rule of law to many places that promptly disolved into chaos and civil war the minute that it pulled out. Britain needs some proper naitonalist pride, and it needs a leader who will drag the 'scum classes' u rather than the middles classes down.
I lived in Britain for a while and I was there under the the best of the Thatcher years, now the country has gone down hill rapibly, anything that is patriotic is deemed to be far right and denounced as being racist, hatemongering that doesn't fit with 'multi cultural' Britain.
Bring back flogging, bring back the cane, and most of all, bring a sense of pride in Britain's history.
On the Churchill bit, that is a bit deceptive, if you had said Winston Churchil then you would have probably gotten a better answer. It would like be asking Who was Becket and getting the answer Margret Becket rather than Thomas Beckett.
ACB
plenty of other places you can go to read about how great china is- start
with the china daily forum- let me enjoy my laughs in peace!
These answers to the 'usual questions' are funny, but I don't know why
people keep claiming "this one stops them in their tracks", or, "their only
answer is '...' ". I find that no matter what you answer with, the locals
will always think that they are smart and you are dumb, and they will
never, NEVER understand sarcasm.
Example: If a Chinese person assumes you are American and asks for confirmation, that is because of historical factors and due to the prominence of America in world affairs. However, if you respond with "No, are you Japanese?", the response will be a hearty laugh as if to say, "See? Foreigners are all naive, child-like idiots and don't understand anything about the world." Never will they realize that you are highlighting the ignorance of their question with a deliberately sarcastic one of your own.
C: "Can you use chopsticks?"
F: "Can you
use a knife and fork?"
C: "Ha ha, of course I can. What a silly
question!"
F: "Exactly my point."
C: "Huh?"
F: "Nothing. Forget
it."
C: "Hmm, ok. But can you use chopsticks?"
F: "..."
Jim
Here, it all depends on your tone, and which language you speak. Don't word
it as a qquestion, make it an accusation.
'no, are you Japanese?' simply isn't good enough, instead try 你是日本人，是巴？ and put some force behind it.
ACB
I know what you're saying, ACB, and I've been there before. I used to think
I could rectify the ignorance of the 1.3b Chinese, one moron at a time,
lol. In the end it just made me even more frustrated and I eventually
contracted "The Fury", a common affliction the symptoms of which begin to
manifest after about the 6th month. Now, I just use these asinine questions
as my filter to separate the locals who are worthy of my friendship or
conversation, and those who are worthy of being thrown back into the
primordial ooze to have another attempt at evolving into an intelligent
being.
Jim
I eventually contracted "The Fury", a common affliction the symptoms of
which begin to manifest after about the 6th month.
Really, the fury?
If I ever became afflicted with the fury, you would be able to see the fallout from orbit.
My answer 'China' was to start publishing the names of journalists unfaily imrisoned by China, along with the reasons that they were thrown in jail by Beijing.
ACB
I'd be interested to see that publication. I'm new to the site, so please
point me in the right direction.
Jim
Follow this URL, http://angrychineseblogger.blog-city.com/read/humanrightsa
ndpersonalfreedoms.htm, anything marked Journalist Case File is about an
imprisoned journalist. Just about everything that I've included is
verifiable by either RSF or the CPJ. There is a master post naming all of
the journalists imprisoned unfairly at the time somewhere, but I can't
remmber what it is called. However, it does not include the latest guy who
was arrested this month as I haven't updated the list yet.
ACB
Thanks, and are you referring to the Straits Times journalist?
Apologies for the OT.
Jim
Question: Do you like dumplings?
Wrong answer: No. They remind me of
obese Chinese children with no arms or legs.
Correct answer: They are a
close tie with noodles and rice.
Question: Are you impressed with our 5,000 years of history?
Wrong answer (1): Let me get this straight;
America is 228 years old and is considered one of the most developed
countries in the world. China is over 5,000 years old and are considered a
"developing" country.......yes I am FASCINATED at how you can achieve
that.
Wrong answer (2): I am absolutely flabbergasted with your amazing
history and lineage. My favorite part is about how the Chinese invented
air.
Wrong answer (3): It's a pretty long history but the Egyptians got
you beat.
Correct answer: Yes it gives your country lots of culture and fantastic antiques.
Question: Do you know how to use chopsticks?
Wrong answer: Why would I want to? Do I use two bamboo poles to dig a hole? No, I use a shovel.
Correct answer: It took a while to master it but now I can pick up peas and peanuts (and those yummy dumplings!).
crazydragon [shengkuangye@hotmail.com]
HKi What's wrong with Shropshire?! :'(
I am very much looking forward to my 3 week trip in Easter 2006 to
Chongqing. My uni (Cardiff UWIC) is twinned with the Sichuan Fine Arts
Institute, and I will be staying there.
Any advice would be welcomed. I'm trying my hardest to learn Mandarin
before I go.
Wish me luck!
Sarah x
This one goes for the great wall.
"No it was a piece @#!%
Q: So, have you met anyone while you've been down here?